Ups and Downs

Life is filled with ups and downs. Even if you look at the American economy you can see how things ebb and flow, how fifteen years ago everything was perfect and we could do no wrong to today where we don’t seem to have enough jobs or money to go around. Ups and downs.

One week I was in Disneyland and the next I was discovering that I had a tumor in my spinal cord. Another week I was taking joy in learning to walk only to then find out that walking was the least of my worries. The week that I finally waved goodbye to steroids was an exciting time, but it was followed by ten days of excruciating headaches from withdraws. The night of the amazing fundraiser planned for us was followed the next day by the emergence of blood clots in my lungs. Ups and downs.

Its been a challenge the last week to find energy (both physical and emotional) following my bout with blood clots because it starts to feel like there’s always going to be ‘one more thing’. Additionally its to the point now where its hard to think about a future different thats not filled with constant rest, doctors appointments, and nausea.

Lately it’s been feeling more down than up…but as we know life is filled with both. Neither define us but both shape us. Both invite us to become new creatures, transformed into something that we could not otherwise be. Some lives are filled with more ups than downs while others are filled with more downs than ups. Most of my favorite people have experienced lots of downs.

As a follower of Jesus my belief is that death’s ass has been kicked–that life will one day be filled with ups–that the downs that we experience this side of death are temporary and only wet our appetite for a future consumed with peace, love, and joy.

Until then I think we’re invited to live into a reality that does not yet fully exist, we attempt to join in with God’s movement in bringing that future into today’s world. But part of that is the freedom and even the necessity to grieve the brokenness (the down moments) of life for what they are: imperfections introduced into God’s perfect creation.

Life is filled with ups and downs. Lately I’ve been experiencing more downs than ups, tomorrow may be different…and that’s just life this side of eternity. We anticipate, we wet our appetite, and we seek to bring that reality to todays world while simultaneously grieving the fact that it has not yet fully come. Downs suck…but that won’t always be the case…at least that’s where my hope lies. Where’s yours?

Jesus the person, Jesus the Deity

A while back I asked a friend of mine to share some of his thoughts about Christianity, faith, and Jesus. I thought it was very interesting and worth posting. It was originally written for a January 2009 newsletter

I have a commitment to Jesus, the person,
just not Jesus the deity. I believe that, for the
most part, that Jesus’ teachings are spot on
for the way we should behave towards
others. I don’t believe that Jesus was the son
of God, or necessarily that there is a God. I
believe he died for our sins but only
symbolically, not actually. He believed that
by being martyred that others would find his
teachings true and avoid sin.

Why Photography is an Illusion*

I’ve had three separate conversations with three separate people over a period of about three days (sounds like that bad Jim Carry “scary” movie) all centered around one idea.

A photograph is an illusion. An illusion, not an allusion…though I’m sure you could allude to things in photographs…The whole concept of snapshots, in whatever field of study, gives the illusion that you are capturing life. But you are not. What I love about quality photographers is that they’re able to capture images that I did not even see. We may be looking at the same object but they see and capture that object from a perspective that was invisible to me. The photographer captured an aspect of their own perspective, but they did not capture reality. Reality is three dimensional, it is fluid, and dynamic.

But don’t get caught up too much in the photography application, because I think it’s a much bigger thing that just photos. My wife was learning the other day about how we test our bodies. X-rays, blood tests, etc. are all ways of taking snapshots of our body in order to asses health. But the problem with these snapshots is that in reality our bodies never sit still as they do for those snapshots. In reality our aches and pains are rarely experienced statically and neither does our body function internally in a static manner. At any given moment our body has numerous functions, cycles, and changes. If we then take a quick snapshot of what is happening in our body at a given moment all we learn is what is happening in our body at that given moment or in that particular stance or with that particular food in our body or…etc. Our body is so incredibly dynamic and fluid that snapshots do not do it justice! They do not capture health (or lack thereof) effectively. And, yet, virtually all of our methods for testing our bodies are based upon a static image.

The third aspect that this idea of a deficit snapshot came up is in defining culture. When someone asks me to tell them about Portland or Vancouver they’re usually asking me to explain the “culture of the Northwest”. What I proceed to do is define a snapshot of the NW. Funky, weird, liberal, creative, coffee, beer, McMenamins…This is what cultural anthropology originally set out to do, define and articulate culture. Missionaries will spend time studying the culture that they are preparing to go serve. We speak of churches having a specific culture. But what in the world does that even mean?! If a specific church has a culture are we referring to the youth group? Are we referring to how the elders operate? Are we referring to their history? What about the young families that are trying to bring change? What “culture” are we referring to? Culture is so incredibly fluid and changing, like a stream, that rather than being capable of capturing it with a snapshot maybe our goal should be to run along side it as much as we’re capable. A snapshot gives the illusion of understanding, but in reality all you’ve captured is your own lens. When you describe or capture a culture all you’ve done is created an image that says “here’s how I view this world in front of me from my own unique perspective” even if a missionary goes to a rural African village, lives in a hut for thirty years, an in every way lives with (and like) the people, he will still always be a white dude that made a choice to live in that manner and could at any moment choose to leave. He will always be understanding that culture from his perspective.

Snapshots serve a purpose, but I fear that in many ways we have allowed them to too greatly define reality as we understand and articulate it. I wonder about the snapshots we’ve used to define faith, the Biblical story, and what it means to follow Jesus.

I think our greatest hope is in the pursuit of bigger ears (listening), bigger hearts (empathy), and an understanding of our limits.

* Please don’t get me wrong, I love photography!

Salvation?

Christians often explain how Jesus dying for our sins works by saying that God is perfect and cannot be with corrupt humanity (because of our sin). So because of this chasm he sent his son (who is God himself) to pay the price for sin (which is death) and thus fulfill the necessary requirements needed for us and him to exist peacefully in heaven. More or less that’s the idea. I could draw diagrams except that I’m too lazy.

One author questions that formula by retelling the Prodigal Son story like this:

…when the son returns from his partying and recognizes the error of his ways, his father responds by saying “I cannot simply forgive you…it would be against the moral order of the entire universe…Such is the severity of my justice that reconciliation will not be made unless the penalty is utterly paid. My wrath-my avenging justice-must be placated.” The prodigal sons older brother then offers to do extra work in teh fields and pay his brother’s penalty. And finally when the elder brother died of exhaustion, the father’s wrath was placated against his younger son and they lived happily for teh remainder of their days.

Do you buy that retelling? Do you buy our current definition? Are you unsettled? Are you comfy? Speaking personally, I’ve got some questions that I’m pursuing.

Enough said.

Who do you look like?

There’s a church planting couple here in the NW that came from a traditional church, had worked in established ministry for years, and felt “called” to work with people in downtown Portland. I do not know these people well so I cannot speak with much insight as to how their lives and hearts have changed over years of doing this ministry. But I can tell you that their appearance has changed. She has had dreads (and has since cut them off and started them again), they have many piercings, tattoos, and they dress the part too. It might be easy for us skeptical types to look at them and make jokes about how they’re trying to look cool or something of that nature. But concerning the way they look my wife heard the woman say that the two of them did not set out to look different and change their appearance. Instead, she said, the more time you spend with a people and the more you fall in love with a people the more you want to look like them and be like them.

As I processed this I remembered me and my other tall and skinny white friend who lived in Portugal together. We stood out. We looked different. We were loud when we road the bus. We wore t-shirts and baggy jeans. But by the time we left some things had changed. Without ever trying or even thinking about it we acted differently in public settings. We dressed differently (embarrassingly enough we began to wear tighter jeans). In many ways, small ways, we began to look more like the people we were with.

I’m intrigued by this idea in two ways.

  1. Are you loving the people around you to the extent that you might start looking like them?
  2. Is your Christian community living and loving in such a way that people who hang out with you are starting to look like you?