The New Normal

My wife is always in a form of crisis. You see, her personality is such that she’s a dreamer. She’s an entrepreneur at heart, someone who loves starting things and getting others to carry them out. Her crisis comes because she struggles with a discontent because of her desire to be somewhere else, to be someone else, or to do something different. Over the years it has been a wonderful blessing for our family!

Right now, however, one of her critiques is that we’ve lost our “hippie” way. It has been a process over the last four years of us learning new things, making new commitments, and cultivating new passions. Nothing necessarily huge…cloth diapering, chemical free, organic food, gardening, riding bikes, taking the bus, etc. It’s simple stuff that many of us, if not most of us do. But lately…wait for it…we’ve begun to use paper plates occasionally! We’ve gotten addicted to (as my previous post shared) X Factor on youtube! We didn’t take the bus at all during the summer! We use ziplock bags and plastic tupperware!

Ok, so you’ve made it thus far, here is what the post has been working toward. Through my wife’s worries over our use of paper products and therefore the compromise of our ideals, we were able to notice something interesting. At first certain choices are incredibly hard. It takes constant remembering and a willingness/ability to make continual new and different choices. It’s hard. At times its exhausting. Other times making new life choices is real easy at first as you have the excitement factor motivating and encouraging you. In these situations its not until a few months into it that you hit a wall and you question why you ever even went down this road! I think this is true of breaking your addiction to creating excess garbage and waste in your home and breaking your addiction to nicotine in its different forms (obviously, this is a very loose connection that is not equal on both sides!) BUT…BUT, the wonderful place that we’ve found ourselves with some of those life changes we’ve made in the last four years is that we don’t even notice them! What was, at one point, a constant annoying choice is now second nature. I don’t even notice that we don’t use chemicals. I don’t miss them and rarely remember that we don’t have them in our home. It’s become normal, routine…

I don’t know about you, but there are certain things in my life right now that I crave to become routine and normal. There are some painful choices, annoying choices, and constant choices that just get old to make even though I know they’re the right choices to make!

I hope you find yourself wanting to make new choices, and anticipating the day that those choices become your new normal, your new ground floor to which you can continue to build up on. What a blessing it is to choose.

The Freedom to Choose

I know a missionary who after returning “home” to America from doing mission work in Africa for some 15 years found himself sobbing in the cereal aisle as he stood there by himself with so many choices he did not know what to do. Where he had been living for the last 15 years his number of choices for nearly everything was limited to one or two items. But all of a sudden he came face to face with the culture shock of have an innumerable number of choices for something even as mundane as breakfast cereal.

In our culture choice has become the new God. Supposedly* the worst thing we can do in our world is to not allow someone the right to choose what they want, when they want it, and how they want it. We are inundated not simply with options, but so many choices that we have even created theology where God is the ultimate chooser. Which job should I take, which dining set should I buy, which china should adorn our dining room table, what restaurant should we go to, which car should I buy…and we beseech the almighty God to make his will clear for our lives because the most important thing to us is that we do not choose poorly. This blog is not even intended to go into the debates that Christians have surrounded themselves with concerning choice: abortion, gay marriage, assisted suicide, health care, and I’m sure the list could go on.

But I want to pause here because I believe there is a hypocrisy in our culture concerning the illusion of choice. I do not know who is at fault, if anybody is, but I do see it and I do believe it must be addressed. You’ll notice earlier that I threw out the word “supposedly” concerning the freedom to choose. Because while this is an underlying assumption, while there is outcry over those those whose choices have been taken away or not allowed like gay or lesbians for example, we have become perfectly comfortable with a level of suppression that pervades our society. I see this in two ways.

  1. Those who are on the outskirts of society, the poor, the elderly, homeless, etc. have been told (in many different ways) that they have no power to choose. Statistically those who grew up in the system of poverty will stay in the system of poverty. Welfare is setup in such a way so as to create suckers, feeders of the system. You are not rewarded for finding work or trying to better yourself. Trust me, I could tell you a number of stories of people who have lost, for example, their food and health benefits from the state that totaled $500 because their income went up $300. What does that teach those in poverty? Don’t make more money! The major blessing for those in poverty with regard to welfare is to have more children ’cause you get more benefits! We shut up the elderly in homes so that we don’t have to care for them. We tell them that their value is in staying to themselves, playing bingo, and knitting afghans that nobody will use.
  2. I should have clarified my previous statements because I do not see this second thing as a suppression of choice but rather a perversion of choice. We have so valued choice in our culture that it is destroying us. Watch Jerry Springer for a moment and count how many times you hear someone say something along the lines of “It’s my body, I’ll do what I want.” or “You can tell me what to do!” Somehow our primary expressions of choice have brought addiction and oppression. Off the top of my head here is a list of things that have become regular in our society through the guise of choice: overeating, using chemicals to grow our food, destroying the earth through pollution, killing babies and damaging pregnant mothers, teenage pregnancy, sex trafficking, the myth of materialism…the list could go on for a long time! Our freedom to choose is killing us! No, seriously, that’s not hyperbole but its both an expression and very much a reality that our freedom to choose has become the thing that is destroying both our physical bodies our our emotional selves (not to mention the spiritual aspect of this that I believe pervades both the physical and emotional).

As I read the stories about the life and work of Jesus, however, I see him constantly empowering people for new choice. Yes, he helps people through physical healing, but it nearly always included a “Go and sin no more” clause at the end. In his teaching, like the Sermon on the Mount specifically, I see him teaching a bunch of down-and-outs that there is blessing in being poor in spirit, in being meek, humble, persecuted, desiring justice, and to be in a place of mourning. I see Jesus teaching a message that says that “you have the freedom to make new and healthy choices! The world tells you that you’re poor but I tell you that it’s actually a blessing to be poor in spirit because the kingdom is filled with them. The world gives you reason to be in constant mourning, but I tell you that it’s actually a blessing ’cause you’ll know comfort more than any others. The world has not shown you justice and so you therefore desire it above all else, but I tell you that this desire is a blessing because if you’re seeking justice you will find it!” I see Jesus taking those whose choices have been seemingly removed from them and he is giving them hope that they have freedom to choose even in the midst of their suffering.

At the church that Jessica will be planting in a year and a half we have crafted a core value that says:

Choice-God’s love is a gift that has not only transformed our future hope but gives us the possibility for restored lives today. Intentionally living out this reality is a gift that can be chosen by any follower of his. We are given the gift of choice.

But is this just one more choice in the midsts of a world inundated with choices? Is the choice to enter into kingdom living that eventually culminates in a clearly heavenly kingdom just one more choice in a world thats overrun with choices? Or is there something different about the message and the method?

Reflections on a Few Years of Church Planting Cont.

James posted this response to Tuesday’s blog
Do you want to say more about the transition from just doing a really good job of doing church to living missionally with the unchurched? That is a journey I need to take.
Here’s the best I can do for a response right now, though I know that there are many of you out there who could answer with much more wisdom, experience, and practical insight.
The transition from being good church people to being whatever you want to call us now took a strong willingness to slow down our life, take a step out from normalacy, and a willingness to change our posture.
Slowing down is important because it’s near impossible to see God within our family if we’re too busy let alone see him at work in my neighbor. Stepping out of whatever I consider to be normal for myself is important because we won’t meet people who need Jesus by hanging out in our same circles (this is more true for paid ministerial staff and life long churchy folks). And our posture is crucially important because it, more than most else, shows people how we’re different. My experience at my local coffee shop is a perfect one. I was there for a month before I ever got to know a soul (aside from one barista who was a Christian). I would go in, order my coffee, and go to the secluded part of the shop where I was nearly in a room by myself, and then I’d plant my face in a book or computer for three hours. Eventually I realized that I needed to step out. So I started sitting in the front area where I was constantly getting distracted by people coming in and out. Then I started changing my posture. I faced the door, I looked up showed that I was paying attention when I was eavsdropping into someone elses conversation. Then, finally, I started interupting and making myself a part of the dialogue. After doing those few things I found it near impossible to get any “work” done because I knew too many people, there was too much going on, and I’d spend a whole morning talking to strangers. It also challenged me as someone who loves to accomplish things. I had to decide to give up some things, to not acomplish some things, and to not be nearly as productive.
So here’s a whole pile of unsorted thoughts…The reality is that the only people that work according to our scheduled work times are the “good churchy folks”. Everyone else doesn’t give a damn about the fact that you’re supposed to go to church on Sundays, be a part of a small group on Wednesdays, etc. It took a willingness to sacrifice more of our time than we desired because opportunities to spend time with people who need Jesus did not happen planned out or at easy moments. Inevitably it was when we were rushing and trying to get our house clean for our home community that a valuable conversation happened with a neighbor. And it’s not that four years ago I wouldn’t have been willing to have a conversation with my neighbor (shoot I would have been ecstatic to be able to talk to my neighbors!) rather four years ago I wouldn’t have stopped cleaning the house to go get the mail when I saw my neighbor chilin’ outside. Four years ago I wouldn’t have stepped out in order to meet that person.
I don’t know if any of this has helped or clarified. If I had to narrow it down to the single greatest challenge to all of this as a minister it would be the idea of redefining success. Programs look better, they fill newsletters better, they often create more buzz and excitement but for the most part they are not the type of success that we’re called to achieve (that last line doesn’t sit with me well ’cause it feels like it’s describing peoples spiritual journey as a measure of my success…which it is not! I hope y’all understand what I’m getting at with that line.) You end up feeling like you might be wasting your time a lot ’cause your not being productive. But my guess is that in the beginning it will feel like more of a choice that by the end will become second nature.
Anyone else have wisdom greater than my own that they’d like to share?
What an exciting gift it is to be able to journey with Jesus in all of this.
peace.

The Neighborhood Coffee Spot

I’m learning to live on mission. That is, to live in a way where I am open and available to stop the “important” stuff I’m doing in order to spend time with people.

So…Marcell’s Latte House is my office. I go there three or four mornings a week to study, meet with people, work on things, etc. But while there I’m doing my best to interupt peoples conversations, ask people questions, and care more about others than my “holy church work”. Today that translated into helping them unload a trailer full of kitchen equipment. And when I say kitchen equipment I’m talking industrial ovens, coolers, display cases, etc. I’m sweaty. I haven’t gotten any of my “important” church work done, but I’m getting to know more people and I’m showing that I care more about them than about my “work”.

Jess and I are helping to coordinate a veggetable swap that will happen during the summer here. Anyone from our neighborhood will be invited to bring their extra garden produce to swap, share, and trade.

I might get a part time job here in the mornings too.

How can you start puting yourself in a place (physical location) where you’ll have the opportunity to get “interupted’ by people? Think about it.

On a “side note” I’d like to say that I’ve enjoyed all the “” in this “blog”.

Sweat Shops, Frugality, and my Conscience

It is a constant battle within myself between conscience and frugality. Well first off, let me say that I am a firm believer that it is much cheaper than one often things to eat healthy and to live a healthy life (not that I live the most healthy life!) My family of four are able to eat primarily organic and local food, we eat very little canned food, frozen food, and processed food, and we eat gluten free (try paying $6 for a loaf of bread). Oh, and my son has to eat lactose free now! And yet, we’re able to do all of this on a budget that would look midgetized next to many. I can go into detail about how we do this if you’d like me to, but in reality it all comes down to my amazing and sacrificial wife. The point is that it really is possible to do make many healthy choices and still be relatively cheap at the same time.*

Nevertheless there are times when its just plain ol’ spendy to shop with my conscience first and my frugal nature second. I didn’t buy any new clothes last year. Period. We didn’t buy anything new last year (except for food, medicine, underwear, and a pair of shoes). It was a cool experiment, it was valuable. But I’m tired of buying used stuff. I want to buy some new crap! But I want to buy it cheap. The problem is that many of the cheap places to purchase things are places that hurt my conscience (or should hurt my conscience). Want to ruin your life? Try going to this website and doing some research about which companies are in active human rights violations in order to get you something cheap: http://www.greenamericatoday.org/

It’s easy to dismiss, and I often do, but do you really want to put on your sweater that you bought for $15.99 at Walmart (just as an example) knowing that some eight year old child worked in a factory 18 hours straight in conditions that are dehumanizing and illegal? Can you wear that sweater without your conscience crying out? The sad thing is that often I’ll choose to not do the research so that I won’t have that annoying conscience whispering in my ear! So there I lie, at war within myself to pursue truth and justice, or to live cheaply in ignorance and bliss.

I truly believe that being a follower of Christ dictates that I am in a constant pursuit of truth, beauty, and justice…following Jesus often requires much!

*     Though, I must say that it amazes me that often people say they can’t afford to eat healthy, because it seems to me that it should be one of the most important thing that you spend your money on. What you put into your body affects your health, your personality, politics, your community, your emotions, etc. If you’re going to spend money on anything, good quality healthy food would be a good place to start.